Life in deep breaths and a hyperactive clock

My life has been flying past my eyes at such frightening incredible speeds. Every now and again, there are moments where I can take a deep breath and time holds still for me as I behold beauty in my eye and heart. I was amazed at the moon this morning, it was crystal clear and I could see for the first time such detail to the surface. It's craters was like pinched white clay as if each one was made by hand, crafted individually with thought. The wispy charcoal clouds moved in streams over the perfectly round luminated moon. It remained me of werewolf films when they show the full-moon eerily, but I was captivated. I hated to tear my eyes away and inbetween the townhouses I searched for another glimpse at it's magnificence. It's times like these that I adore the most.

Day three of sporting the non-fashionable nicorette plasters. I didn't crave a smoke hardly at all yesterday, today is another matter however. I hate that I am addicted, that through habit it is programmed into my head. I honestly wish they banned it all. I'm feeling the dizziness now, the arteries expanding and pushing volumes more of blood to my brain and muscles. My brain had been rationed oxygen and the rush is overwhelming. Soon, the real over-eating will begin. It acts two fold, to eat means for me that I have something to do inbetween those seconds I am free as a bird and secondly to divert some of the blood from my brain to my stomach (stopping the dizziness) I'd sooner be a few kg heavier than continue my commitment to tobacco so bring on the cake and biscuits!

I'm proud of myself today, not just for the non-smoking, but because I played my first line of music in 10 years. Okay, so it was twinkle twinkle chocolate bar, it was liberating. I'm going to learn to play it smoothly now. I tell you what tho, holding the bow is no easy feat. I have to make my pinkie do press-ups and hold my hand it what looks like I had a seizure which left me terribly deformed. I will be taking in my violin into "work" to practice, I can teach they kids music as I learn which would be brilliant too.