Here goes nothing

I think for the first time ever, I was having the coolest wet dream ever. It was so bizarre. Everyone in the dream switched bodies with someone else, panicked a little then got right down to business.

I woke up feeling so lonely again. That loneliness that makes your stomach turn inside out. Men, tons of them have bombarded my thoughts. I feel like I did six months ago. The consolation I have this time is that I know this will pass and I will pick-up from where I left off. Hopefully stronger than before.

Men, why do they have this effect on me? I stayed strong and in control for so long, only for it to slip right through my fingers only to be left defenseless and wounded. I shouldn't care about any of them. Just myself. One may be the loneliest number but I'll turn it into the strongest too.

Such a big part of me wants a hug, from anyone right now. But this thinking has lead me down some dark alleys. So I must stamp it out. I don't need anyone, I don't need anyone. Men serve no purpose in my life. What do I need a man for? I'm going to make it, one day the world will love me for who I am. Who needs one man when I can have the whole world? I have a dream, and no one will take that away from me, I am in control of my own life. I love my life. I live how I choose and the choices I make are to the best of my knowledge.

Work comes first, I must maintain a drive to succeed. Stay positive, focus on what I am doing. I WILL get what I want.

I don't need anyone's approval or opinion, although if it is to the benefit of what I am doing, then I will peruse change. Keep your head low, keep it simple. Have faith in myself.

I have three weeks to hand in my project. In that time I must learn how to use photoshop, and CAD. I have all the pieces, now is the time to put together the puzzle. Do-able, yes. I start tomorrow morning. I have everything I need.