Man-Stupid

Ah Tony, you do make me giggle. How I wish we were sitting at the same table bouncing off thoughts from our archives of philosophy and randomness. Your words just reminded me of a story from a Taoism book. Where a visiting enlightened monk stays in a monastery and has a non verbal discussion with a foolish monk using only hand gestures. So the story goes the foolish monk interepeted the conversation as a personal insult and quickly became annoyed. The enlightened monk interpreted the same conversation that the other monk was so passionate about Tao and taught him a life lesson, he then left humbly in respect to find further enlightenment before he felt ready to challenge the foolish monk again!
How you remind me of this enlightened monk!

For my words man-stupid was not an insult to any man, but rather calling myself man-stupid :)I read in a passing junk email some true words about intelligent, attractive and ambitious women facing similar relationship problems in finding love and the right man. The problem is that career minded women think that because they are successful in work, they will be successful in anything else they do including love. However women do not realise that their skills are non-transferable and their thinking is in fact detrimental to relationships. So smart in every way but man-stupid. Hehe

I do not think men are stupid. That is a generalization that I would not put my name to. I think mankind on the whole are ignorant, myself included. I believe that since developed intelligence of the mind, we have been struggling to find self-realisation which in turn leads to enlightenment. People are too concerned in finding themselves out in the world and letting it mold them from their experiences. How they have handled a situation only says a fragment of who we are and is no way to collage these experiences into some solid bottom line about who we are. I only say this because at some point in every ones life, we will do something we don't want to do. We can only say who we are from our experiences when we have done something from the heart wholly involved.

My eyes have opened to a world I never knew existed, delicate and beautiful like spring blossom loosely attached to the weathered tree. It cries to be touched and held yet fluttery disintegrates if one tries to take the flower. Therefore, I can only let the image burn into my minds-eye for I can not take a piece away with me. It holds true that the best times of our lives are when we cannot take a physical picture of the image before us but only to love it when it is there now. I now see with this beauty the impact it must endure from the human hand. It is naive to think that we have no significant consequences either collectively or individually. For each breath we take on our world is changing it. After breathing which is our unconscious action, we should all stop to think what are the conscious decisions we are making that impact our surroundings. When I was younger I was very supseptable to this message and to this day there are little things like turning off the water when brushing my teeth and using cold water for the dishes that I carry forward. It made me sad that I knew I was aiding the death of our fragile planet. Even still when I speak of it, people brush me off with a "what can we do" attitude. The fact is there is a lot we can do, but most people do not want to sacrifice their luxury for it. Over time, I too took on this approach that one person cannot do anything so why think about it. But now it is hitting me hard again. A book called "the green imperative" has put it all in black and white the true cold facts about our dying planet and I found it hard to swallow and absorb the enormous problems humans have created for ourselves. There are already good alternatives for energy sources and materials but the people that can make the big changes refuse to do so out of fear for the economy. If we covered 4% of the worlds desert in solar panels, it would supply enough energy for the entire globe. The only desert that is natural is in Australia, the rest are man-made. This to me a message that arrived to me in bold flashing neon lights. The Egyptians were so advanced for their time they were using solar panels and light bulbs in the pyramids. This is why mankind is ignorant in the 21st century. We had everything, of course we could not have progressed without some detrimental effects to mother earth but no real attempt has been made to counter-act these actions. It has thrown nature out of balance completely and now we are already feeling the effects from the era of mass production which only started less than a century ago. Earth has maintained itself for 4.5 billion years yet the most dramatic changes in such short period of time are consequences of man kinds demands. We have known about holes in the ozone since 1956 and what a huge and important role this protective layer provides us with. Without it, life on earth would never exist! So what are we doing about it? If you ask me, I would say not enough.

Sex, Love and rocknroll

When a woman gives her body to a man, she has come to some sort of agreement with her mind and body that sex is what she wants. When she believes the conditions are right and this is the person she wants it with. My point is that more and more women in `developing' countries do not wait long before going to bed with a man. Every woman wants some sort of emotional fulfilment and majority for women don't know how to get it from a man. The western-thinking woman I come across instinctly know that sex is a way for bringing themselves closer to man and brings the relationship to a new deeper level of intimacy. However if the foundations are not solid and there is not deep understanding of how their partner thinks then sex will always be sex and not making-love. It doesn't require virtually any trust to fuck someone, but to go deeper than fucking your heart and soul must be content to let their partner see all your flaws. By this I don't mean that a couple are comfortable enough to fart and belch in front of each other. But to understand each others insecurities and deepest worries. Most people do not even see these in themselves and it takes someone who loves you unconditionally to bring these obstacles to light and conquer them together. This strengthens the individual if they realise there are personal changes they need to make and they have support of someone there to guide them through. As a consequence this strengthens the relationship and brings it to another level. Now all of this is just from talking and listening and `reading' a persons actions. Then when emotional intimacy is at it's peak, it draws you to be physical to express yourself. Holding hands, playing with hair, caressing, kissing. Everything says volumes to the other person of how they feel.

For example as a contrast. I was in a park with a man and he kept trying to kiss me and hold me. Which is fine because I had kissed him before in closed doors. But the thing that got me was that he was trying assert himself over me in front of other men who were looking at me. So first this said to me that he has a deep insecurity of losing me to another man and the way to combat that is to establish a physical relationship and if I like the sex then this should ease the anxiety. However, it's trust he wanted from me, not sex. The sex would just be a bonus.

You have coined some women who exposes themselves as `just exhibitionists'. A category like depression, obesity, nymphomaniacs, and paedophiles. What you are saying is that they can't help being the way they are and their brain is wired to get a sexual kick out of exposing themselves. Which I'm sorry but it can be helped but it requires a lot of strength to see the error of their ways. Then again most exhibitionists don't even see a problem with what they are doing. Like men watching too much porn. Let me ask you, do you think there was as many paedophiles ten years ago as there is today? Or where they all in hiding? I think there are many more men that fall into this group today and a lot more are young males in their twenties themselves. So what's causing this demand? Could it possibly be that a naked woman is no longer taboo? That they want a younger body and mind? For what reason? Yes I generalise a lot when I talk because to go over each individual’s circumstances takes a deep understanding. I believe I can see why these `disorders' are cropping up in society like it's going out of fashion. I have had long conversations with criminal minds, paedophiles, exhibitionists, bi-polar suffers, all walks of life. Because I seek to understand what is the root of the problem. You will find these people aren’t happy on the inside, they just have a very good facade. So perhaps it is you that should get more exposure to the world? If you can't see that they are unhappy then you are fooling yourself.

Please tell me what would be the RIGHT reasons for `fucking around'? The way I see it is that more-so women in particular are fucking around because they haven't found what they are REALLY looking for. Back to my original point, they don't know how to get it.