I have come to realize a deep connection between our wandering souls. Both seekers of the elusive truth in love and romance with arms wide open yet only to embrace a preset illusion of the mind. Yes, we have both trodden along the same path many times enjoying the details of what we may have missed the time before and piecing together a bigger picture. Suddenly our romantic attachment elopes all the previous ones yet still eludes us. The adage says that we will keep repeating the mistake until we finally realize that something we have missed. The big question is how can we charge our soul and find someone to share ourselves with? Psychology of relationships tells us that we do not find the one in six billion to be our one and only soulmate. We create our soulmate out of the next to perfect best match. It is not a conscience decision but when it does happen, chemicals in the brain and body are produced which makes us feel giddy and in love. It has actually been compared alike to a state of madness and euphoria when analyzed on Cat scans in laboratories! How ironic.
But I have actually come to realize however that I am chasing in circles. Yes learning much along the way from relationships, looking for that love that is buried inside my innocence and fairy-tale dreams. Once you have had a taste, it is one acquired and perused indefinitely. However, I have had to break the chain and step away from chasing these dreams which is leading me futher away from my goal and Mr Perfect. You hear about people falling in love in the most random places and the rest is history, but I am picking up and soul searching these people when they are just taken aback that I a total stranger would take deep interest in them. That's why currently I am having to physically stop myself from knowing everyone's inside story. I stand strong and stubborn to my vow of abstinence until my mind, body and soul is ready to open up to another person.
unfortunately happiness is only a temporary feeling with a partner and sure to fade speaking personally. Oh how we struggle for that lasting feeling that can take our breath away!
My directions in Uni is to uncover new grounds and most importantly be myself. It is too easy to become sidetracked and de-railed from peers and lonelyness. I remember to do at least one thing I like to do and stay true to my views and opinions. Most students are out drinking all night and not sleeping until their lectures are finished the next afternoon. However I feel this would devastate my health and well-being which is my main priority during my long three year journey and stay. But on all accounts I am no square as you know!
It is funny that you should say you have a somewhat mystic view of my actions and feelings. This is not your imagination working overload but yet a much more fascinating skill infact! From what you have described, this is your "mind's eye" at work. A third eye if you like which does allow you to travel where your body physically cannot due to technical impossibilities. Highly valuable and able to enhance like a camera zoom for clarity and definition. When in Malaysia I would be able to see my mom and into her stae of mind, even what she was cooking! This is much like a window into another dimension yet discredited and lost by natural extra sensory perception learners. The mind's eye is neither limited by time or space dimension. I have actually seen other planets unidentifiable in the Milky way!
I do feel as if I have something valuable to the world and mankind, I can give back to society and Mother Earth and make a difference however small yet significant. Possibilities are endless and conventional rules do not restrict my thinking which is a rare trait. I know my life journey will be filled with events and knowledge yet I have only a dream to pursue. I say "dream" opposed to "goal" simply because a goal is a dream minus impracticality and facts of cruel reality. These are the boundaries I speak of which must be overcome in order to achieve some form of greatness and personal fulfillment. The destination can be changed at any point of time yet when you arrive it is fate and destiny that I should be there. The elusive destination is never the real focus of life, the journey SHOULD theoretically be. What we do with our lives and how we choose to lead them are the real challenges and joys. And why not, we can't have fun when we are dead! So yes, live life to it's fullest YET bare in mind the boundaries set in our own minds to protect us from harm to self and others.
That what cannot be expanded sometimes should be left in that fashion. However, understanding and comprehending the unexplainable is vital information much like brain food. Questioning and pawing over that which puzzles our mind can lead to break-through thinking, on the flip-side, it can deteriorate the mind,body and soul and leave us in a worse situation than ignorance shielded us from. Curiosity never killed the cat but can leave it more confident and aware or shaky and introvert.
In life or afterlife, I think you should not have a fear of being judged either by mortals or gods. If you believe that you are leading a life in a productive and enlightened way you are not nearly there! Even our great Einstein believed that he was only a humble student to the Arts and Sciences. Mathematics baffled him and yet his natural inquisitive side questioned everything until is mind was satisfied. No one was born knowing 1+1=2 this is merely acquired knowledge passed down from someone who created the numeric system and thought that it made sense. Good thing too! But my point being is that retribution and divine judgment can still be argued and up for debate. Innocent until proven guilty right?
